The Husband’s Duties – Ephesians 05:25-29

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Text: Ephesians 5:25-29

Introduction

1. Our previous lesson argued that marriage is not an institution

a. Created and designed by man or the state

b. Subject to alteration by societal whims

2. But rather, that marriage is a sacred institution

a. Instituted by God in the beginning

b. Regulated by Jesus and His apostles in the Word of God

c. Reserved for sexual intimacy between a man and a women

3. Indeed, marriage is a successful institution

a. When we follow the Biblical injunctions concerning it

b. When members of the family fulfill their proper roles

c. Preventing marriage and family from becoming an emotional and psychological straitjacket, the proverbial ball and chain, and source of much strife and hurt in one’s life

4. What are those Biblical injunctions concerning the proper roles?

Body

I. LOVE YOUR WIVES!

A. HUSBANDS ARE TO LOVE THEIR WIVES

1. As Christ loved the church – Ephesians 5:25-27

a. He gave Himself for the church!

b. He nourishes and cherishes the church!

2. As they love their own bodies – Ephesians 5:28-29

a. Which they nourish and cherish

b. Which they handle with care

3. Free from bitterness – Colossians 3:19

a. That is, resentment or hate

b. Often accompanied with wrath, anger, clamor, evil speaking – Ephesians 4:31

B. HUSBANDS ARE TO LOVE THEIR WIVES

1. With “agape” love (active good will)

a. Which is commanded – Ephesians 5:25

b. Which is defined – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

c. The same sort of love we are to have toward God and all men

2. With “phileo” love (sentimental, affectionate)

a. As one would have for his own body – Ephesians 5:29

b. As parents would have for their children – Ephesians 6:4; 1 Thessalonians 2:7

3. With “eros” love (sexual)

a. Joining together as one flesh – Ephesians 5:31

b. Providing physical attention and affection due the wife – 1 Corinthians 7:2-5

4. Husbands have a duty to love their wives in every way!

II. RESPECT YOUR WIVES!

A. BY HOW YOU TREAT THEM

1. With understanding – 1 Peter 3:7

a. In an understanding way – 1 Peter 3:7 ESV

b. Be considerate – 1 Peter 3:7 NIV

c. Learn what makes her “tick”, and treat her accordingly

2. With honor – 1 Peter 3:7

a. Praise her in the gates – Proverbs 31:28

b. Put her on a pedestal

c. Do not ridicule her publicly

3. As to the weaker vessel – 1 Peter 3:7

a. Not that your wife may actually be the weaker vessel

b. Many wives are spiritually stronger, some physically stronger

c. But treat her “as” a weaker vessel (treat her like china, not steel)

B. BY HOW YOU VIEW THEM

1. As a fellow heir of the grace of life – 1 Peter 3:7

a. For whom Christ died

b. A beloved sister in Christ, worthy of respect

c. With whom you hope to spend eternity

2. As one who affects the efficacy of your prayers! – 1 Peter 3:7

a. How we treat others has a bearing on our prayers – Mark 11:26; Proverbs 21:13

b. God will not heed our prayers if we mistreat our wives! – Malachi 2:13-16

III. SUPPORT YOUR WIVES!

A. BY PROVIDING FOR THE FAMILY

1. The husband (and father) has the duty to provide for his family – 1 Timothy 5:8

2. Failure to do so is to deny the faith (the doctrine of Christ!) – ibid.

3. Unbelievers (and most creatures) provide for their own

4. A man should not take a wife unless he is willing and able to support her financially

B. BY LETTING HER CONTRIBUTE

1. The virtuous woman contributed much to the support of the family – Proverbs 31:16-19,24

2. A wise husband lets her contribute, and to be praised for it! – Proverbs 31:31

3. Of course, not to the neglect of her familial duties – Proverbs 31:21,27; 1 Timothy 5:14; Titus 2:4-5

Conclusion

1. The Christian husband is a man who

a. Loves his wife in every way

b. Respects his wife by how he treats her and views her

c. Supports his wife financially, emotionally, and spiritually

2. This is because the Christian husband is a man who

a. Is a Christian first, and a husband second

b. Gladly accepts the Biblical injunctions given to him as a husband

c. Looks to the Word of God and prayer for the strength he needs to fulfill his duty

3. When a man is a Christian husband

a. He is more likely loved and respected by his wife

b. She is more likely the sort of wife she should be

c. The children are more likely as they should be

4. In our next lesson, we shall consider the duties of wives.